Grimm's weblog

I can say without hyperbole that Club Dread was the Best Thing Ever ©.... humm okay well perhaps a bit of hyperbole. But it was still damn funny, hella funny even. I laughed so hard I started weezing on more then one occasion, for some odd reason on more then one of those occasions I was the only one in the place laughing, but screw those stuck up movie going losers, the movie was funny!!
Was it as good as Super Troopers? I can't go as far as saying that, but it was by no means disappointing. Infact, in one area the movie managed to outshine its predecessor, that would be in the T&A department. The ammount of titties shown was unexpected and for the most part quite welcome, speaking of which; If anyone has some pics of Pene-lope or any of the other girl's whos names I've forgoten, then please do post them on the PicturePile... for research purposes of course... yes, that's the ticket. I'd especially like to do further research on that blonde and brunnete from the begining of the movie, if you catch my drift. If anyone has a picture of the pac-man maze, that would also be great, that whole bit was BRILLIANT and had me laughing like crazy.

To wrap this up, Broken Lizard's Club Dread was hilarious, old school Broken Lizard fans will not be disapointed. If you have a stick up your ass, and are not a fan of Super Troopers, then why would you even bother going? ... sorry that was directed at the douchebags that were bad mouthign the movie as we were leaving the theater.

I got home and saw an envelope on my desk from the Revenue Agency. I said to myself "WOOT! my 50$ GST cheque", so I ripped that baby open and was taken back by the ammount on it.

It turns out that the cheque is not the GST refund but, a reassesment cheque for 2002. They sent me $600!!! CHA-CHING!! Free money!!! This weekend we're gonna party like it's 1999, everyone come out, the case of cocaine and hookers are on me.

I got to work late because of complicated reasons... well not really. The reason was that I was watching TV and wanted to see how the movie ended. Since I'm just as dispirited with my job as Bashtard, I didn't really give a rat's ass about being late, plus the afore mentioned Bashtard was holding down the fort just fine without me.

So the point of this blog, apart from whining, is that Slashdot pointed out to that I'm pretty much obsolete at this job that I hate: "Two Spam Filters 10 Times As Accurate As Humans"
Lets see if I get my dental plan before they lay me off, as everyone knows Lisa needs new braces, so that's the least I can hope for.

What I want to know is why can't I have a job that I actuall enjoy? This tech support, systems monitoring, spam training, tedious piece of crap job is just really so unchallenging and unfulfilling, that it makes my head numb.
I'm a creative person, I need to be creating things other than hundreds of trouble tickets about somone forgetting to plug in their DSL filters. So I've decided that once I leave this place, if I can't work, at doing something I like(creative director, graphic design, web development, code monkey, etc), then I think I'm just gonna throw in the towel on this whole IT industry thing. I think I'd like to open a bakery, one that specializes on pastries, maybe have a kick ass Bear Claw that we're famous for. That sounds much more fulfilling than dealing with annoying peoples stupid computer problems. Can you imagine that? A place where I can actually get to *gasp* interact with real life human beings during my work day!! That just sounds insane compared to my current position, which has me being alone, bored and isolated for the most part of the day. Maybe we can offer free 802.11g access for people aswell,. be a bakery/cafe type place, yup that would be sweet.

Cradle Of Filth suck so much. Dani Filth is a fucking homophobic douchebag and I wish nothing but terrible things for him. I just had the mispleasure of seeing their new video on Loud, Babylon Ad, I belive it was called. What a waste of film that was. There's a fine line between cheeky fetish S&M fun, and the degrading treatment treatment of people. If you can't tell the difference, fun is when both parties are enjoying themselves, and being an asshole is when you appear to have nothing but contempt for the people partaking of the play scene.

The road conditions being what they were today (ice, all over thanks to the early day 1°c weather turning into -2°c at night), Mon wussed out on me and didn't want to leave her house. So instead of going out we just stayed at her place and watched movies, braided each others hair, painted our nails, had pillow fights etc.

So while watching Fashion Television, we saw a model profile story about a Canadian model. Turns out this model was from Mississugga, and it turns out Monika knew her... sort of. This tall cup of water use to take the same bus as Mon for four years or so. Isn't that crazy? Mon said this girl was crazy tall and really pretty, and if she were to try out some hot, lesbian, girl-on-girl nookie with any girl in the world, it'd be this model, closely followed by Milla Jovovich of course.

We also watched some movies, the last of which being Romeo and Juliet. Unfortunately that endeavour ended in tragedy, and no I'm not reffering to the story. You see the movies we consumed were in DVD form, and R+J (a brand new disc mind you) had a gltch. At the very end of the movie, right when Juliet picks up the gun after having seen Romeo die, the movie STOPS dead. Well actually it pixelates for a split second, then STOPS dead!! Since we had no idea what happend after she picked up that gun, we had to piece it together from everything that led up to that moment.
And our final theory is that the priest walked in, she capped his ass, then stole her dowry from her parents and left town and Paris far away in the dust.
With her dowry money she started a new life and got a puppy, and named him Romeo, as a tribute to her lost love. What a great story, I think I'm a little misty eyed now... I gotta go... talk amongst yourselves... here's a topic: Ministry of Sound is neither a ministry nor a sound, discuss.

I went out for a little winter-gleam today but forgot to moistureize before going outside. So now my face is all wind burnt, and red, and sore. Aloe vera save me now!!

(And for those keeping track, yes I've been up for 27 or so odd hours, and I'm starting to feel it)

I have just started reading what might be the best book ever written about a programming language. It's called Why's (Poignant) guide to Ruby, and is available for free under a CreativeCommons license.

I'm only up to the middle of chapter three right now, but I can already appreciate how brilliant this book is. I've never been so entertained whilst reading about a programing language. Till today, I had never had even the slightest interest in Ruby. But after starting this book, I'm itching to try it out, it just seems like such an elegant language.

Even if you have no great interest in Ruby or programming in general, you really should go read the first chapter or two because this is truly a gem of a read(get it? Ruby, gem... wakka wakka). And the book is free as in beer, so you have nothing to loose.

Here is a little exerpt to whet your curiosity:

Any plain, lowercase word is a variable in ruby. Variables may consist of letters, digits and underscores.

Variables are like nicknames. Remember when everyone used to call you Stinky Pete? People would say, “Get over here, Stinky Pete!” And everyone miraculously knew that Stinky Pete was you.

With variables, you give a nickname to something you use frequently.

Thanks to Simon Willison for the great find.

Sure there was a deep-seated animosity between me and that bitch. But for her to go out of the way to fuck me over like that is just incredible. Yes she deserves to die, and I hope she burns in hell.

So I had to tell snuffleupagus to say “hi”. After that, we were cool and had a pleasant romp, and a nice conversation about body piercings.

It's Valentines day, and Spike TV is showing the best Valentines day movie of all time. That's right, Star Trek VI - The Undiscovered Country. If Christopher Plumber as General Chang does not bring a tear to your eye, then you sir are made of stone!

I read about these toys in last months Wired(Issue 12.01) and meant to mention them, but it slipt my mind till I saw it in their archives, so here's the skinny:

These toys are a big craze over in Hong Kong and Japan right now, and have recently hit the shores of New York. They are soft vinyl, urban inspired, collectible action figures. Designed and manufactured by artsits in limited runs, not soulless corporate whores *cough*Mattel*cough*. These babys are amazingly designed and because of their limited nature they seem to fetch a pretty penny. But with good reason, they are just totally bad ass!!

For more info go read the article and once your interest is properly piqued, check out these related links.

• Wired: The New Cubicle Commandos
• kidrobot.com
• Miami Herald - Charlie Calderin profile
• brothersfree.com
• Brothersfree movie(.mov) - kidrobot.com
• showstudio.com
• freshnessmag.com
• Cute Robot Project
• ToyTokyo
• smooth-on.com (learn how-to make your own plastic figures)
• Polytek(learn how-to make your own plastic figures)
• kidrobot forum(discuss making your own figures)

Tonight the gang and I decided to go to the movies instead of hitting the bars and clubs. After much debate, the movie we eventually reached consensus on watching was The Butterfly Effect.
It was a surprisingly good movie, and so as to not spoil it for anyone, I'll keep this review brief and succinct... although that sentence was redundant and really not at all succinct... so I'll have to try harder from this sentence onward.

For those not in the "know", or unfamiliar with the movie's premise, The Butterfly Effect is a good old fashion yarn about the problems with time travel and altering one's past. Even though some members of my group had doubts about Ashton's ability to act in a dramatic role, they were eventually wooed over by his work. He really carried the movie quite well, and no one ended up feeling Punk'd about having spent time watching it. Amy Smart who played "the girl" in the movie was also very good. The way she portrayed different, but sort of the same versions of herself was the best display of temporal acting since Michael J Fox in Back to the Future 2.

Like I said I'm being succinct, so I'll wrap this up quickly. The movie was a fun romp, and I would highly recommend it. Before ending this post though, I feel a need to mention that I made a very witty comment as we were walking out of the theater. I said "So in that new present he created, we never do find out if doughnuts exist in it, so how can we be sure it's right?", the one's that got that subtle Simpson's reference were QUITE amused by it. So feel free to use that line when you watch the movie, you'll impress everyone that hears it.

Todays snowboarding excursion was great. Nice weather, nice powder, nice snow park. I landed some of the jumps I tried! And my manual is getting quite bad ass. I had the nose a good 30cm in the air, which is not too shabby for the stiff ass board I have.
Other than the insanely early time I had to get up (they were knocking on my door @ 9am!!!), it was a nice fun day.

Now it's time to work the kinks out of some muscles in a nice warm bath and then get ready to see what the night brings, thats right ladies LOOK OUT, I'm on the prowl, grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

My world makes no sense!!

Since I didn't get tickets to Conan in Toronto(even though I did answer the middle name question!!), I settled for the next best thing: Ed's Night Party!

The show was taping today, downtown at the CityTV building that all toronto dwellers are familiar with. We got there at 2:30pm and were greeted with a full house. As we walked in, to the right of us we spied the infamous hot tub (aka. The Wank Tank). Mellisa was determined to get me in that thing, but as I kept saying "There's not enough chlorine in the world to get me to set foot in that bacteria pool". And as we found out from Ron the audience tamer, the Wank Tank participants were chosen well in advance of the tapings, so there was no way she could get me in there anyways.
After checking out the tub, we were lead to our seats, and from there we got a chance to check out the rest of the set. Which is actually alot smaller then what I expected. On TV, with their mirrors and fancy lights and camera witchcraft, the place looks WAY bigger. The set actually just had enough room for the 4 go-go dancers, the hot tub, the Professor's DJ stand, and the desk for Craig and Ed. Okay so that doesn't sound that small actually, but, well it seemed smaller than on tv... shut up : P

After taking our seats, we had to wait about half an hour for them to finish setting things up. While we waited, the afore mentioned audience tamer Ron, did his best to keep the wrestles audience entertained. During the Q&A session he told us that they filmed the Electric Circus in the same room we were sitting in, one of the audience members asked him if we could get on it, to which he replied "No you're all too old for the EC" (inferring that they only want jailbait dancers on that show ; )
Once the setup was done, things finally got underway. The guy that does Ed's voice came out, as did Craig, they got into their places and the show took off. Craig who is usually ammusing to watch on TV was even funnier in person. His wacky facial expressions are at least doubly funny when seen in person.

The live show seems way better than the version we see on TV, that's mostly attributed to the fact that it has much better flow live. Ed and Craig's banter is uninterupted, theres no out of place cuts to the same old bikini footage from Daytona beach and there's no commercial breaks. Speaking of scantily clad girls, the Orgasm.com hot tub girls were for the most part decent looking busty blondes. Most were attracive and all if you into the "baywatch blonde barbie" look, or the "hang out at Squareone and has bad hair streaks" look. Well they were all mostly like that, with the exception of Danielle, she was crazy hot. Since I didn't get her phone number(boooo), I was gladly ready to settle for access to her website so that I could catch another glimpse of her, but the cheap CityTV people provided NO freebie access to her website!!
I did leave my email address with Ron and told him to give it to Danielle if she needed consoling after her traumatic hot tub experience with the creepy old guy. I'll be keeping an eye out for correspondence from her.

Apart from the hot tub girls, the other famous eye candy on the show are the go-go dancers. There's not much to say there, they had cool outfits for the most part and knew how to dance well. One girl, K???? something with a K... She had a REALLY cool outfit. It was a low cut top that looked like bat wings, with a matching mini skirt. And I mean MINI skirt, while she danced every few seconds her gyrating about would cause the skirt to ride up enough to show her red panties. If that isn't MINI then I don't know what is... well maybe it was a micro not mini skirt... whatever don't bog me down in semantics, it was short, hot and bat shapped, that's all that matters.

A mere 7 hours, 5 episodes and 1 lunch break later, my posse was getting tired and wrestles so they made me leave before they finished taping the last episode. Ron let us go up Ed's desk and we got to talk to him and Craig and got some autographs and photos taken. We didn't think of bringing a camera, but Ed had his digital camera so he used that to take the pics, and will hopefully not forget to email them to me.

They are taping more shows in May, and I've asked to be on the guestlist so if anyone wants to come with, let me know.

Ohh I almost forgot, when you see the episode where Ed makes fun of the proffesors taste in movie, listen for my W00T when they mention Super Troopers, I was the only one to respond well to that classic movie ; )