Bashtard's weblog

'suck' is defined as:

1. To draw (liquid) into the mouth by movements of the tongue and lips that create suction.
2. To draw in by establishing a partial vacuum: a cleaning device that sucks up dirt.
3. To draw in by or as if by a current in a fluid.
4. To draw or pull as if by suction: teenagers who are sucked into a life of crime.
5. To draw nourishment through or from: suck a baby bottle.
6. To hold, moisten, or maneuver (a sweet, for example) in the mouth.
7. Vulgar Slang. To perform fellatio on.

The congregation, or "roundtable" as we will call it, was accurate in their decision that I suck. I, of course have to draw (liquid) into the mouth by movements of the tongue and lips that create suction. This is done to ingest fluids that are vital for survival.

They are also accurate, that as a baby I was breastfed, much like most other babies then gradually worked to being bottle fed, so "To draw nourishment through or from: suck a baby bottle." would make sense.

I'm not one for candy, but I do enjoy a lollipop every now and then. To do that I have to hold, moisten, or maneuver (a sweet, for example) in my mouth.

In the vulgar sense, I am very much heterosexual, so this is an inaccurate observation.

I appear to agree with almost all of what the "roundtable" has concluded about myself. Should they ever meet again regarding myself, I would be delighted to know what other observations they could make.

When you can't find your gel pack that you would normally use to ice down a pulled groin muscle, what would be the next most logical choice?

Obviously frozen blocks of mozzarella cheese.

Piece of advice though... don't start talking on the phone to a special lady friend and forget about the cheese, cuz "man, I have to replace the block of cheese on my crotch. It's starting to go soft." isn't a very good pickup line.

I still don't buy Grimm's theory that Hyundai cars are a FPOS, but man is this dealer reinforcing my hatred for dealerships.

I took my car in at the start of July for a simple 60,000km servicing but inquired about a few problems.
My inquiries had landed me no car for roughly 40 days. Then... I got 'the call'.

"Your car is ready. Come and pick it up any time."

I go look at it today and the major problems are fixed, but there are new problems because the douchebag who fixed the rust moronically sanded the bottom of my doors, so they are next to rust. Also there is a huge scratch along the entire distance that he painted to cover the rust.
Technique?? Maybe??

Getting back to the dealership... I know they outsource this stuff, so I shouldn't be too harsh but my god, at least get me quality if I'm willing to be without my car for a month. I was forced to leave a voice mail for the Manager to give him a deal to offer $50 to fix all the spots that I noticed as being problem areas, plus one new one that I never saw cuz the car was always so dirty (I live on a dirt road... c'mon).

We'll see how that goes on Monday. Until then though, I'm forced back to that FPOS Olds Alero.
God damn I hate that car.

...and SHE said, "what's up with that?"