I'm sure I'm not the only one who has been bombarded with spam for viagra, "enlarge your penis" , "pleasure her more" , etc...

That's all fine and dandy that I can turn my penis into an 20ft Incredible Hulk ** currently 19ft :p ** and can tear a womans vagina to shreds, but I'd rather the spam be of a different sort. It would make them worthy of at least reading before instant deletion.
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Subject: There is a woman knocking at your door right now and wants to fuck your brains out.

...**knock knock**....**Answer door**

Me: 'hello'

Girl who wants to fuck my brains out: 'lets go at it'

Me: 'that was the best 10 seconds of my life'

Girl who wants to fuck my brains out: 'are we more than friends?'

Me: 'uhmmm.... yeah!! that's it, more than friends'

...**knock knock**...

Me: 'sorry, got another email. you'll either have to join or leave'
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Yeah... that would be good spam.
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Hello,

Thank you for your email.

Please email abuse and include full headers if you don't want women to come to your door and fuck your brains out.

Regards,

bashtard